I’m not sure what is is about suffering that draws me in — I had a beautiful childhood — chalk full of roaming the mountainside and building forts with my parents&siblings and making a fire in the fireplace when a thunderstorm took our electricity. We played outside, the brat of a teenager I was got abercrombie and fitch clothes once a year.
I know it’s not guilt (which is everyone’s cynical and critical analysis), but i’m not sure what it is. Hopefully I’ll spend my whole life, or l hope I will, working to just live and experience it.
Sometimes, I wonder, if it’s because getting to work alongside people who are or have truly suffered is just so honest. Bare, raw, uninhibited actions and emotions. There’s some quote out there posted that (synopsis) says how honest and empathetic people have the hardest time with the world because they expect everyone’s actions to be as honest as theirs. I think that’s truly the way I am… I always mean what I say. And I expect when other people say things that they mean it to (for better or the not so nice).
Tonight I thanked my dad for being just a good, good person. And for raising me to be an overcaring, need to help, the world is my oyster to play in kind of person.
God, I am so lucky and I’ll spend every day of my life living.